crazythoughts.com
This link goes to a fun-looking website I found that asks some pretty interesting questions. Some of them are actually kinda rude but ignore those.
And I'm gonna answer some that I liked (that aren't too rude) cuz not all my posts are supposed to be serious stuff.
Q: If man evolved from monkeys, how come we still have monkeys?
A: Well, supposedly we evolved from a certain kind of alpha monkey. Maybe they were kings of the Ape-ish world of All Great Monkey-ness. But the lesser monkeys didn't have the right DNA and stuff to evolve to the Great Human Beans. So obviously we will still have monkeys because there had HAD to be some monkeys that were farmers and peasants and of other lower class.
Q: When does it stop being partly cloudy and start being partly sunny?
A: Obviously, when it wants to.
Q: If God sneezes, what should you say?
A: Scream "Oh my GOD!!!". Because God just caused a sudden miniature hurricane in your area.
Q: Is there a time limit on fortune cookie predictions?
A: Maybe the lucky numbers have something to do with that... maybe the numbers are actually a code to hide the deadline for your predictions.
Q: What is Satan's last name?
A: Yes, that's right. It is Satan What. No one can guess it cuz no one realizes they are actually saying the name in the question.
Q: Is it legal to travel down a road in reverse, as long as your following the direction of the traffic?
A: Someone should definitely try that! :D
Q: Why is it that when we "skate on thin ice", we can "get in hot water"?
A: Because there used to be a large lake covered in thin ice that peopled were super tempted to skate on but underneath that ice was a volcano made of boiling hot water that magically didn't melt the ice. The government people and the other kinds of authorities warned people that they will get fined or in deep trouble if they skated on that ice. But one day an idiot person did and because he was an idiot, the ice decided to scare him and cracked under his feet even though it had never melted against the hot boiling water volcano. So the idiot got in hot water. Then the authorities and such found out so they fined him and he got in trouble. That's how it came about that when we "skate on thin ice" we could "get in hot water".
Q: Why are the little styrofoam pieces called peanuts?
A: It should be interesting to note that the little Styrofoam pieces were called peanuts BEFORE someone actually found a nut that looked just like it and started to call the nut a "peanut". The nut that you eat was not called a peanut before. It was just called "Curvy Strange Nut" but no one would buy it because of the name. Then all the way from across the sea from somewhere in Europe, someone brought the Styrofoam peanuts to show to the Americans in a way to kind of boast their inventions. The Styrofoam peanuts were very popular for some strange reason and many people wanted bags and bags of them. The man who grew the "Curvy Strange Nut" thought the peanut looked just like the nut he was growing and decided to call it "peanut" instead. That made his sales go right up to the top. Years go by and ALAS everyone forgot that the Styrofoam peanut came before the one that you eat.
Q: Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don't lay eggs.
A: Because the chickens took forever in delivering the eggs themselves. They kept getting sidetracked with every crumb or worm they passed on the way.
Q: If milk goes bad if not refrigerated, why does it not go bad inside the cow?
A: Obviously because cows are magical and filled with good luck. I mean, look at what happen to Jack after he gave his cow up for a bean? The bean was MAGICAL and grew into a beanstalk that took him on the adventure of his life and made him and his mother super rich at the end.
Q: Why is the Lone Ranger called 'Lone' if he always has his Indian friend Tonto with him?
A: Because "Lone" is the name of the place that he was a ranger at. It doesn't mean "a-Lone". No one asked anyone to put an "a" in front of "Lone".
Q: How far east can you go before you're heading west?
A: Hmm, never mind that. The Russian Far East is actually kinda north from my point of view.
Q: If London Bridge is standing why is there a song about it falling down?
A: London Bridge in the song is actually a person who had very poor balance when standing up and kept falling down without actually hitting the ground. He'd just kinda be leaning severely. People made fun of poor London and often told the lady (the "my fair lady" in the song) that he liked, that he was falling down again just to make him look bad to her but that only made her like him even more. They got married and had a few kids in the end. One of the kids had very poor balance when falling down and kept standing up.
Q: Why do we sing "Rock a bye baby" to lull a baby to sleep when the song is about putting your baby in a tree and letting the wind crash the cradle on the ground?
A: It was actually a creepy song sung by a psycho mother who hated babies and wanted to kill them by putting them in a tree and making the wind do the job to make the babies go to sleep, FOREVER. Someone found the song long after the psycho mother died and never really looked into the true meaning and now here we are, singing it to our babies in hopes to make them go to sleep.
Q: What does PU stand for (as in "PU, that stinks!")?
A: Peppers Understand. Because we all know for a fact that all peppers have good understanding about everything.
Q: If Mars had earthquakes would they be called marsquakes?
A: You know, they should. We should have jupiterquakes and saturnquakes, too.
Q: Why is it called a funny bone, when if you hit it, it's not funny at all?
A: Because a long long long time ago, our funny bone used to actually laugh and make very good and funny jokes when we hit it and it was called a funny bone. Then we evolved and got smarter than our funny bone so it stopped laughing and making jokes. Then, finally, it became completely silent and started to hurt and feel weird instead. Sort of like a revenge because we humans had the nerve to say it wasn't actually really funny all that long long time ago. It's feelings were hurt.
Q: If you speak only one language, are you lingual?
A: I think that would be "singual".
So, hope you enjoyed that! Some of them I got a little creatively carried away but, anyway. Happy Random Day and see you later alligators! :D
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