I kinda DON'T believe in God

I grew up with a Catholic mother. She taught me the bible, the stories, songs, prayers, we went to church sometimes on Sundays.

As a kid, it was all just interesting and fun. Well, not church XD I was so bored and the only parts I enjoyed was getting a share of "the body of Christ" and singing songs and putting the little bit of money in the donation bags.

Do I believe in God?

That's a pretty big question. Let me break it down for you because it involves lots of little questions.

Do I believe in an entity that watches over us from above?
No.

I don't believe that is possible. I don't believe something can watch over the billions of humans that live on Earth all at the same time. Argue with me as much as you want "oh how can you say that when you don't even know?" I'll repeat your question right back at you. "How do YOU even know?"


Do I believe in an entity that is bigger than all of us?
Not really.

I'm a bit ambiguous with this because I can't prove that there is nothing and neither can YOU prove there is something.

Until there is proof, I'm willing to stay ambiguous on that.


Do I believe praying works?
No. Unless you do something about it.

If you are just praying and not doing anything, nothing is going to happen. You can pray, go ahead, but then do something about it yourself.

Surgery, and other medical things, you can't say "oh it's up to God". It's up the people who are treating the patient and the people who are researching the disease and the people who are coming up with medicines. Praying to God may give you strength, I believe that, but God will not do anything for you.

You need to do it yourself.


Do I believe God exists everywhere?
No. He can't possibly.

If there is a God, he can't possibly watch over all of us. Babies are being born every single day and people are dying every single day and people are suffering every single day and people are probably praying everywhere every single day.

God would have to transcend space and time and probably get a headache, that is, if he even has a head.

If you can't prove that he exists everywhere or that there is something out there (other than molecules) that does exist everywhere, I am not going to believe anything can exist everywhere at the same time.


Do I believe in the word of the bible?
Kinda.

I believe the bible teaches us important life lessons like accepting people with differences. But, I don't believe the miracles are all true. They are stories written by storytellers. Yes, I believe there was a man named Jesus. He was probably very smart and very wise and liked by many people. When people idolize someone, they can exaggerate stories.

And how many centuries ago are we talking here?

Things that can be explained easily today, were miracles back then. Like the man who was crippled and Jesus said "Walk." And then he wasn't crippled. What could have really happened? And how crippled was this man anyway? I'm not saying Jesus is a fraud. I'm saying that he was probably a very smart man who knew what to do to help people that most thought could not be cured of their diseases.

Who knows? I can't prove my theory and neither can you.


Do I believe in the resurrection of Jesus?
Erm...no?

Scientifically speaking, it is possible for someone to seem dead, their heart actually stopping, but then actually not be and "come back to life". How do we know for certain that Jesus actually died on the cross? We don't know. He could have well been alive.

So, if Jesus was alive, he didn't resurrect. He just came out of the tomb. People don't understand such things back then because they didn't have medical technology. So, they believe he's been resurrected from the dead.

Jesus after that? He probably wandered off somewhere to live out his life in a quiet little village.

I can't prove that though. But neither can you prove that he was resurrected from the dead.


Do I believe in the afterlife?
Kinda.

I like to think that there is something after death. A nice, warm, sunny, happy place. Yes, sure it's fun to think that Heaven has it's own city and you can eat and do anything you want, but that can't possibly be true.

I do like to think that there is SOMETHING after death. I like to call that place heaven. But it's not the same heaven as the one in the bible where there are angels and God. Jesus might be there because he's human, too.


On a side note: Do I believe in a previous life?
No.

It's fun to think about, but I do NOT believe you can have previously existed in another era. That's just crazy.


So,
Do I believe in God?
Kinda no.

I don't believe there is some large entity watching over us, listening to all our billions of prayers, and who helped a man create miracles. I believe there is something after death, and I believe the bible (the New Testament in particular) can teach us important life lessons. I also do believe Jesus was a real person.


So there you have it.

My beliefs.

Don't argue with me or try to "convert" me or try to "pray for her because she's got the devil inside" or whatever. These are just my beliefs and opinions. Please respect that as I will also respect your opinions :)

See ya later, alligator ;)

MY SMILE IS WEIRD. (inspired by Malinda Kathleen Reese)

Inspired by Malinda Kathleen Reese's video (which you can watch here or click this link), I decided to write this article.

I do NOT like seeing my reflection.

I only look at myself in the mirror when I'm brushing my teeth or washing my face or tying up my hair...or making faces because, let's FACE it, we all do that ;)

Why do I not like seeing my reflection? I don't like to have my picture taken either and I was once told that "There is NO WAY someone can NOT LIKE having their picture taken."

Duh.

I'm a walking, talking example among many others.

It was an idiot guy who thought he knew me better than I did.

Here are the reasons:

1. I don't like seeing myself smile.

It's not because I think I look ugly or I have low self-este...actually it might be a little bit of low self-esteem...but because I just think I look weird when I smile. I don't hate my smile. I just think it looks weird. Nothing negative about it. My smile doesn't make me gag or anything. But, I don't want to stare at myself smiling.

2. Why fuss over my face?

I don't wear makeup. I'm not worried about a zit here or there. This is my face. Here it is with all its raw glory. That's the reality. Okay, moving on. Not important. I don't see value in worrying about what my face looks like. If you don't like my face, I don't care. Maybe I don't like yours' either.

3. I don't like having my pic taken because I can't smile for a pic.

I can never plan a facial expression. I'm just not a very expressive person on my face. If you knew my thoughts, well, that's a different story ;) You'd be surprised with the contrast (which I do show in my YouTube vids).

4. Why YouTube?

You might be surprised, or maybe not, that when I record myself, I can see myself. It doesn't bother me AT ALL. Actually, it used to a little bit until I was able to look at myself objectively.

I'm a person on YouTube. How would I want to see a person on YouTube? How would I want them to express themselves?

A TON of facial expressions? Alright. We'll do that.

It HELPS for me to see myself when recording videos.

Okay, you got me. I'm probably a walking, talking contradiction.

BUT I'M NOT.

The times I CAN look at myself in the mirror and smile without feeling weird is when I'm looking at my reflection as though it belongs to someone else. As though I'm looking at a video of someone else who changes their expressions when I do.

Weird?

Maybe.

But I've solved a lot of my mental mysteries on my own BECAUSE I can look at myself or the situation objectively.

Hmm.

Maybe, if I can figure out how I do it, I can teach people who to view themselves objectively...although if they go to a therapist, they might learn that.

Hmm, bummer. Thought I could make good business off of it XD

See ya later, alligators :)

Black Wedding / White Funeral: WHY NOT?

Black clothes for a wedding.

White clothes for a funeral.

That's not right, or can it be?

Ever wonder why not? Why not wear black to a wedding? Why not have a brighter funeral? Yes, someone died but what if that's your dear, dear grandmother? Would you WANT to have a gloomy old funeral?

NO.

So why not spice it up a little? Why not bring in some color in your dress?

Wedding in Color

Weddings don't have to be a pure, innocent, untainted white. You don't have to still pretend you are Queen Victoria who got married in white in 1840 and basically set a permanent trend.

But that's the thing. There is no such thing as a "permanent trend". Besides, people in Scandinavia apparently wore black wedding dresses before the Victorian era and people elsewhere wore wedding dresses of different colors.

Today, why still wear white? It's not the frickin' Victorian era, people! (Lori Mae Hernandez's audition reference).

What if someone wants a goth wedding? Well, white doesn't really match well with that now does it?

Funeral in Color

Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying black or white are not colors to be reckoned with. They are...something. Black is the exclusion of all color and white the inclusion of all color simply put. You could say white is infinity color and black is...something.

If you have ever, EVER thought about your own funeral, you might really want to consider assigning a dress code otherwise every single living soul (even the neighbor's cat) is going to come in black.

If I'm dead, and watching over this funeral from heaven, I think even I would be depressed if everyone wore black to my funeral. Think about it. Just imagine everyone you love, dressing in black.

Black is associated with lots of sinister and gloomy things. A spooky night, the unknown, black holes, ditches, bottomless pits, black cats...although black cats aren't supposed to be evil or bad luck.

I would want the people I left behind to smile. Not because some of them are gonna get my money but because they know that I am at peace (if I die peacefully. If it's an accident, yes, be gloomy because I will, too.)

Get this: the reason we wear depressing black to a funeral is the Victorian era's fault again. In the 1500s in Spain and also before the French Revolution, people wore white. Widows, especially it seems. But then comes the Victorian era. I like the Victorian era but please, black???

And because the U.S is a copycat of the U.K, black at a funeral became a THING.

No one seems to like to talk about the possibility of wearing other colors to a funeral.

Darn.

And look at all these rules!

At my funeral, I'll tell people the rules are: No skimpy, revealing outfits and no dark colors but men must wear suits (because colored suits are just no.)

Why do we have color preferences?

Clothes shopping, car shopping, a good pair of shoes, what to wear today, everyday we are surrounded by choice of color.

Now, I'm not gonna go into the science of why we see certain colors or the difference between color in light and color in objects and how it all works when we see color. Basically the light of the color is bouncing off our eyes and then we see that color. There's an episode about color on the Magic School Bus show and I'm pretty sure you can watch it on YouTube. Never mind you're not a kid if you're not. It's such a good explanation of how it all works.

Back to choice of color.

Why do we choose certain colors? Why do we like certain colors? Why do we have color preferences?

This gets into the psychology of colors. Why do I like blue? Why does my friend like black? Why do some people find certain colors appealing and others don't?

I often think when I choose a color for clothes or for items like a computer mouse, why do I always look for blue? I like blue but why do I like blue?